Back to School for GrownUps

…. just in case you ever decide to go on and do the grad school thing…

There are all kinds of things that can be helpful  to know when you are an undergraduate… not only in case you do decide to apply for graduate school - many of the same things can be helpful in terms of applying for scholarships as well. And you should be applying for scholarships, as well, by the way!

Anyway… focus, flit!

Some things to keep in mind during undergraduate studies

KEEP EVERYTHING YOU WRITE.

You just never know when one of those seemingly pointless papers you write during the course of 4 years of school will be just the thing to pull out, dust off, and use again. Part of the whole grad school gig is attending conferences. When you get a Call for Papers, it can be really helpful to have all of your previous papers on hand ….one of them might well fit.

Of course, if your proposal is accepted, you will probably want to rework the paper given what you’ve learned since… but they can make a great starting place for writing a proposal at least.

Best bet - when you receive your graded paper back, go back to it and correct the original file accordingly. Fix any typos, awkward sentences, etc. And then save it someplace safe with a good filename, and make periodic backups. You may never need it again - but if/when you do, you’ll be glad to have it.

DEVELOP RELATIONSHIPS WITH PROFESSORS

For both grad school and scholarship applications, letters or recommendations from professors are important….and the better your professors know you, the more likely they are to be willing, able to be positive recommenders.

Being a good student and doing well is a good start…but there is more to it than that, I think. Show up when they offer special essay times. Ask them for advice - not only about the work you’re doing in the class you’re taking with them, but about your academic career, about journals to keep up with, conferences to attend, etc. Stand out by taking an interest in their work.  Oh yeah…and if they wrote the textbook - buy it, and ask them to sign it too.

Something else you might want to consider here is that you are not necessarily limited to the profs at your university. Nothing to stop you from making contact with professors in areas you are interested in at others when you have the opportunity.

VOLUNTEER

Not for everything that’s going on ….. you have to have time for your life, and of course, for your schoolwork. But volunteering/showing up for wisely chosen activities can go a long way to building your connections and your applications.

With all I had to juggle during undergrad (I was taking care of my ma in law who had Alzheimers and couldn’t be left alone at all) I didn’t have time for ongoing committment type of stuff… but I did manage to turn up for things like the writers’ festival my prof arranged (and still do; I love it), and volunteered for a conference they held - which gave me exposure to the whole conference thing as well as earning me some brownie points.

What else? Any of you other experienced back to schoolers have advice/thoughts/ideas re: things you wish you’d known in undergrad? Or things that you did that worked well for you?

So …the reason we left CHALLENGES to the end of our Evaluation process is because - if you’ve spent time and energy on figuring out what resources are at your disposal, and what your priorities why ) - HOPEFULLY the obstacles to completing the items on your to-do list have pretty much resolved themselves. 

But, yeah, I do know that that is not always the case…. and that some obstacles & challenges just are not easily resolved.

One of the biggest problems, of course, is that each day only has 24 hours…. it doesn’t matter how much you’re trying to juggle, or how many people’s needs you have to meet… you still only get 24 hours. And whether you like it or not, you DO need to sleep.

A once in awhile all-nighter is one thing… but too many of them is likely to wind up COSTING you more time than it gives you. Getting sick, cranky, overwhelmed, sleep deprived, clumsy, etc. etc. rarely contributes to success in the long run.

So - you have to work with what you have.

Other obstacles can include a lack of $$$$, confidence, or family support, and difficult profs …. all big issues that deserve a blog of their own, I think…. look for those sometime in the near future.

Now…. what’s left on your list re: challenges/obstacles/barriers?

I wish I could solve them all for you …. but since I don’t know what they are, I’m pretty useless, I guess…. I’d be happy to try to help find solutions if you’d care to email me with a specific situation though.

And in the meantime, I hope that you’ve discovered that by actually taking the time to break it all down and actually LOOK at what’s contributing to the load you’re trying to juggle has helped somewhat.

Sometimes, just recognizing the number of balls you’ve got on the go can help …. for me, anyway …. knowing that I DO have a lot to manage and therefore need to be a bit nicer and less demanding of myself can go a very long way to allowing me to take a deep breath and get on with it.

I would love to know what you think of the Back to Schoolers 101 series. 

Is it helpful?  (or, if you’re not actually doing the BTS thing, do you think it could/would have helped if/when you were?) 

And most importantly, what other topics do you think would be a good addition? 

This is a continuation of Step 3 re: Evaluation: Priorities. Before that, in Step 2, we talked about Evaluating Resources … and before that was Step 1: Take Stock .

Before I move onto the next bit, evaluating obstacles/challenges, I thought we’d spend just a bit more time on HOW we evaluate priorities.

It is relatively easy, sometimes, to let things get a bit muddled up… to get more worried about what is best for everyone ELSE and forgot to prioritize our own needs. And to get all bent over needing to be PERFECT (or as close to it as humanly possible) …. and not being happy with what we do accomplish in spite of the many challenges we face.

Not that I would ever be guilty of any o’ that, of course

It is a really good idea then, when you’re going through your list of priorities and deciding on the things you absolutely gotta-do to keep the following questions in mind:

WHY is this so important?

WHO is going to be hurt if I don’t do it (or don’t do it as well as I’d like)?

WHAT is the cost of doing - or not doing - it?

Also… a reminder…. especially when it comes to school assignments - take note of what things are WORTH in the overall scheme of things.

A paper that is worth 30% of your mark is worth worrying about.

A paper that works out to being worth 2% of your final mark is NOT. Seriously!

Just this week, I had a student opt not to hand in an assignment that was worth a fair bit because they “didn’t have time” to get it done. But that same student DID find time to complete 2 tasks that together total a pittance in terms of marks. *sigh* DO THE MATH!  When you jot down your assignments in your date book or Blackberry or wherever, why not also make note of how much it is worth?

Anyway ….speaking of priorities, time for me to go vote (strike vote… ICK! I so hope we don’t go there) … and then go to a lecture.

So …step #1 was to Take Stock .

Step #2 was to Evaluate - Resources .

And now we are onto evaluating PRIORITIES.

Got your list in front of you? You DID make a list right? Good for you - want a sticker? If so, send me an email with your address and I will be happy to send you one

Alright…so today we are looking at your priorities. How long is your list?

Does it include everything you’re trying to juggle right now?

• Good… now chop it. Seriously - I want you to go through it and cross off everything that nobody else but you cares about. If no one is going to get hurt if it isn’t done, and it’s not going to cost you anything, cross it off.

There…doesn’t that feel better?

• Now… go through your list again and put a star beside the 3 most important/pressing things. Nope… not 5, or 10, or 20… just the top 3.
• And find the 3 that can wait the longest too…. mark them somehow also…. a triangle or a line or whatever turns your crank.
• Now…. with the rest, if there are any (and if there are, are you SURE you can’t dump a few more?) … those you are going to look at one at a time and ask yourself - and answer honestly, of course - if you really have to be the one to do it.
• Is there anyone on your resource list that might be able to help with it?
• If so, take a minute and ask them if they’d mind. Worst that can happen is they say no. And if they do, it stays on your list and you do it when you get to it.

Ok…once you’ve cleared off whatever can be delegated….

• The next step is to look for any that you could do right NOW and DO THEM. Don’t forget to cross them off.
• With the stuff that’s left over, go through and make note of the date they have to be done BY.
• Oh - and if any of them are great BIG things (like a 20 page essay for example) - break it down into steps and figure out when the steps should be done by (for your SANITY if not for actual due dates).
• Once you’ve done all that, hopefully your list will be becoming more managable and you’ll be able to really PRIORITIZE it …. as in put things in order of PRIORITY.

The things that are time sensitive but not IMMEDIATE don’t count when you’re feeling overwhelmed …. you write those down in your datebook and try to plan when you’re going to do them. It will feel better, honest.

One of the biggest reasons we non-traditional students get overwhelmed is because we (and I am including myself cuz I do it very well, ask Steph , she’ll tell ya) tend to get fussed about everything that we know that has to be done ~whenever~ ….rather than focusing on what needs to be done RIGHT NOW.

To do lists - especially ones that you update frequently - can be a lifesaver… but you have to keep up with them in order for them to help ….  and that can be tough even for those of us who are fortunate enough to have all the toys …..I loves my Blackberry and my laptop(s) ….but even the Blackberry doesn’t do me a damn bit of good if I don’t put the stuff that needs doing IN IT so that I can worry less and function more.

I’m not quite done going on about priorities…but this will have to do for now, cuz I have one more blog to write, a textbook to consult, and I need to get to BED…I teach early tomorrow

More next time.

Step 1 was Take Stock .

Now that you’ve done that, you have a list, right?  Priorities, Challenges and Resources….

So …. now it is time to EVALUATE.

Which one of the 3 lists is the longest? Bet it is not Resources - or else, you wouldn’t be searching the net looking for ways to manage juggling school, family & finances. So let’s start there:

• Look closely at your list…. have you included the services that your school offers to help students who are struggling, one way or another? Every place I have been involved with has support services of some kind - for people with disabilities, students who need counselling/tutoring/study help, and even some financial assistance. They usually all have housing centres and job banks, also. What supports are available at your particular institution?
• If you don’t know, start with the counselling centre, whatever that’s called where you are. They can help you find additional supports, honest… and that is what they are there for. Those counsellor types are often also very good at helping one do the kind of work we’re trying to do here - and they will have a lot more to work on if you sit down and talk to ‘em than I do.

• Next - did you include your professors as resources? At LEAST one of them? Most people that teach do so because they LIKE teaching - and they want their students to succeed. (Yeah, I know, there are a few that aren’t like that - but seriously - if you don’t have even one prof’s name on your list of potential resources, that is NOT a good sign). Talking to a prof - sooner rather than later - can go a long way toward helping you to succeed at school …and NOT just with school issues.
• Connecting with profs - and letting them know when you’re finding things tough (preferably without whining) - can not only help in the short term…  but it goes a long way to help you actually build relationships with them …and that, my friends, can go a VERY long way when it comes time to ask for reference letters for further programs or for jobs.

• Okay … onward… next up - how many of your fellow students made it onto your resource list? Why not? They are probably one of the best possible resources you could have. They know what you are dealing with (at least at the school end of things), they know what its like, and they are THERE.
• Making connections with fellow students makes a whole lot of sense - you need someone that will pick up handouts or let you borrow their notes, and so on on days when you can’t make it to class. And most everybody else needs exactly the same sort of thing… so you do it for them, they do it for you. Usually it will work out to be reasonably fair - and if it doesn’t, and you need their help way more than they need yours, treat them to a coffee here & there: it will be fine.
• I know that it can be hard to make connections with fellow students sometimes - especially if there aren’t all that many mature students in the group - but make the effort anyway….really! It is well worth the time & energy.

• Family & friends that are willing to help? I hope you’ve got some of those on your list already ….if not, you’ll want to be workin’ on that, also. And if so, have another look at them and consider whether any of those already there could do something to help with whatever’s dragging you down right now.
• You do NOT have to do everything all perfectly, y’know. And you also don’t have to do it all by yourself. Ask for help - the worst that can happen is that - whoever- will say no. And if that happens, so what? You will have lost NOTHING.
• One good friend that you can stress and whine and complain and …did I mention whine?…. to can make all the difference sometimes, also (thanks for that, Stephanie )

• Another resource that should be on your list is TIME. If all else fails, and you just can’t find a way to do everything that needs doing when you think it needs doing…. s’okay….  one thing about those schools, y’know… they tend to stick around awhile.
• Which is not to say that you should give up, drop out, and forget about the whole school thing…. that is NOT advice I tend to ever give anyone …. but if all else fails and it just can’t work RIGHT NOW, that does not mean it can’t ever work. Sometimes, you have got to set priorities…. and that, of course, is where we’ll head next time.

• And in the meantime, here’s some homework for you - yeah, I know.. like you need more o’ that

Go back to your Resources list and add at least 3 places/people/things you could try asking for support/help.

It is all too easy to get overwhelmed with school ~stuff~ …. and when you are also juggling kids, other family responsibilities, friends, jobs, caregiving, household stuff, holidays, finances, etc. etc. etc. on top of school, if you don’t occasionally get overwhelmed, chances are you are doing something wrong.

Judging by the search terms that are bringing people to this blog, lately, a whole lot of people are looking for pictures or information about the Blackberry Curve - and the rest are looking for ways to cope/manage/survive/juggle their way through school.

Much as I wish I could write a blog post or two that would provide support and some answers to everyone that happens to come on along this way, of course, I don’t have all the answers. I don’t have them all for MYSELF, never mind for anyone else.

Every time I THINK I’ve got it all under control, something else happens…. and as you no doubt know, when you’re juggling a whole bunch of balls, it doesn’t take a whole lot to mess up the works.  Bet pretty much every Back-to-Schooler finds the same sort of thing, though.

So…. some strategies… starting with step 1. TAKE STOCK.

One of the main reasons no one person can come up with an easy answer for anybody is because of the changable nature of the challenges we face and the  resources we have on hand.

So …if you’re starting to feel overwhelmed - or preferably sooner - the first step to getting & staying on track again is to stop, BREATHE, and take stock.

1. What has to be done? When?
2. What are the most pressing challenges/obstacles?
3. And what resources do you have available to work with?

Next time: what to do with that information.